fuck people .. i am so sick of being swiped away after being smashed on the windshield of everyone else’s problems when I have my own major ones to deal with … speaking of which, some financially poor, desperate fuck decided to screw some other financially poor, desperate fuck like me and smash my car window and steal my fucking stereo, the only thing worth anything in my crappy junk of a car … i just wanted to listen to music, that’s all, just some music to calm my razor-edged nerves …
You understand.
I want to lift my broken beached shapes into the pentacle scarred seasick skies that can only reach for a home, mapped fatefully in my looking eyefull abode. I’ve collected years of conversations that have now eroded and changed like color-beaten, sand washed seashells that can only reveal a laughing ocean roar, one I believe we both wish to hear, pressed hard against our ears in the darkest or lightest of reasons and moments.
It is near midnight and I have already watched the hues of sunset plunge, keel over, and dwindle to a fiery flicker from my viewing left. Hands gripping the steel rail from my third floor becoming as tense as the damnation of shadows striking the falling road breathe.
Whispering my gratitude to you beneath my tongue tied sore words to the close of this hinged summer spring express, that is now leaving on the greatest of essing rails that trail down south.
If you listen closely enough the sun is singing. Belting out of orion’s pocket and spilling from the milky way, void of lies, only a truthful realisation of what spaces may change with the sound of music. Or words. Thank you for your consideration.
You have always – always been one of the most inspiring people i have ever met.
ha, yes, understanding, i always seem to … i think it is my most crucial downfall and my last saving grace … paradox prone as i am … conflicted as always, two-sided as always, Janus with a face of the most severe empathy i never knew existed … especially in myself … sorry for my cynicism. It isn’t you; it’s life and i am, as i’ve always been, fully immersed and broken by it …