warning- contains average American bias … all suppositions subject to change randomly and without notice:

independence is a trend now

and your life is a monoculture

your husband/ wife/ sinf. otr. is a good investment

your neighbor is decent if they leave you alone (most likely you couldn’t recognize them in the supermarket)

america is technically not a democracy (a country where all citizens vote on all issues) it is a republic (a country where the public elects officials to do everything for them)

america is technically not free (uninhibited units of anything) and technologically advanced but quite controlled and a new form of a capitalist oligarchy (no elected president has been anything but filthy rich beforehand; japan got cellphones before us; europe has magnetically powered trains; and Sweden is powered sustainably, which means when the oil wars run out of fuel and the power lines form veins beneath the earth which cease to bring juice, sweden will still have switch-on lights and running water. this somehow equates to a better life. don’t ask me why, i only know this from printed and spoken word, which is quite doubtful as well)

philosophy is a bedtime story

philosophy is the poor youngster/hipster’s escape

philosophy is dead

music mostly consists of about 5 abused scales these days

art is everyone’s hobby

art is a photoshop nightmare

movies are one-liner headaches but we still enjoy them. they are the one thing we can agree on doing … at least as long as the movie lasts

drama is something we do to keep the sex good

boys need mothers for their wives

girls need fathers for their husbands

Marriage is a cliche

you honestly don’t give a shit you work a corporate job because still, you are not your job or the person you act like at your job, or even hold by some default the same economic beliefs as your corporation practices … not consistently at least

even though you are not particularly special, you still rock because you are a living, breathing, sentient being that can adapt to a multitude of environments within a 24 hour period and you can change faster than any other creature on this planet … will you is the question

every point of the universe is radiating out or is the so-called and much obsessed about “center of the universe.” so even if Ptolemy was thought incorrect and arrogant for placing earth at the center of the universe, Einstien was a coward and just as stubborn as an Irish Catholic when he discovered this (his data told him one thing, his deterministic beliefs made him believe another) soooo … each one of you is the center of the universe (key chains that say this still suck) *read the SUN magazine to feel better about being human and faulted*

unless we blow up a hundred hydrogen bombs all across the globe, the earth will rejuvenate itself one way or another … we (that being humans) will have become the only species that has single-handedly caused its own extinction (there have been 6 mass extinctions in the history of the earth according to scientists; the earth is a beautifully fertile and resourceful creature; it will kill its own children if need be to save itself. take that anti-abortionist Nazis). an ice age will more than wipe our bad decisions out. the hard truth for human rights activists and environmentalists.

i am half-seriously concerned about all of this and i don’t feel guilty about it

i’m sure there is a contradiction in all of this somewhere, but a coherent theory of everything never appealed to me, and i love the logical/philososophical loops self-contradiction and self-referencing has. so be it … (read “godel, eascher, bach” for a deeper breath into this, and no, i haven’t read the whole monster yet either)

i am generalizing and i don’t care. it still applies.

which amounts to me asking someone, quite seriously and without a smirk of irony or cynicism for life’s little cruelties:
“would you like that gin shaken or stirred, sir?”